We have all, at some point or another embarrassed ourselves greatly.

I am actually quite a master of embarrassing gaffs .. if medals were awarded I would clink and clunk around in my armour of gaff medals like a big Scottish Armadillo

Alas, no medals, just a bit of embarrassment and a whole load of jokes that are STILL being flung at me…

It all started sweetly enough …  let me go back to the beginning.

Last year an annual camping trip was planned for last weekend, being women without a crystal balls (ok ok .. I don’t mean it the way it sounds!) .. we had not forseen the problems with the weather and at the very last moment the trip was cancelled.

Thankfully I have some huge hearted friends in Karen and Twanky who kindly quickly organised a weekend in Blackpool in static caravans (much more comfortable than tents!) .. and .. even more kindly invited myself, Vaner and my friend Meg down to Leeds for 2 nights before hitting Blackpool.

Their hospitality was breathtaking, they wined us, dined us and robbed us of all our 5p’s at cards! and the 2 nights we spent there were filled with raucous laughter and alcohol (not something I normally partake in these days!).

Friday seen us up and away to Blackpool .. with Val travelling down by train to meet us in Blackpool .. the four of us (myself, Vaner, Meg and Val) in one caravan and Twanky and Karen along with the lady they are caring for in another).

After yet more robbing us poor Scots (and Spanish!) at cards (although to be fair I think Vaner did actually steal some of my winnings so I can’t blame it all on Twanky and Karen!) .. it was decided that on Saturday that Karen and Twanky would spend the day with their charge and the other four of us would hit Blackpool to do some sightseeing.

That was the plan.   It didn’t turn out that way… Basically it rained…. I was only wearing a t-shirt and trousers .. I was frozen .. then I remembered the lovely blue 99p cape that my sister had bought me for the holiday in Cumbria the week before .. so I put it on (please note that we had already consumed 2 jugs of Woo Woo’s at this point!)  .. much to the horror of Vaner (who does look like my carer in the photo above!) but also to the complete amusement to Meg and Val .. it did however serve it’s purpose and get me into the next pub relatively dry!  Where I proceeded to gift it to the DJ who so lovingly amused himself with taking the mickey out of the “fresh meat” lesbians who had accidentally stumbled into his bar.

Anyway .. to cut a long story short .. 9 hours of drinking and we gave up and caught a taxi back to our lovely static caravan .. well .. we would have .. but we couldn’t find the bloody thing .. these caravan parks are huge .. and every row looks just like the other .. eventually (after much winging and moaning from me!) we did find it and all was well again in the world.

The next day Meg and Val decided to take themselves off for a walk, Vaner was banned from going for run due to her heavy cold so we lurked around in the caravan.   Vaner was suffering badly and sneezed so violently she managed to head butt the wall … I laughed so much I farted loudly .. which caused so much hilarity I farted again (even more loudly) oh the shame!!! …. and I am not being allowed to forget it either!!!