Life is all about relationships

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I was watching Mrs Brown’s boys tonight … and at the end the words “life is all about relationships” were uttered from Mrs B’s charming mouth.

It got me thinking ….

Life IS all about relationships .. we start our lives bonding and forming relationships with our parents, our siblings, our family, until we reach the age where we begin to make choices in our relationships, who our friends are, who our best friends are … who our crushes are ..

Each relationship we have is not always the right or best relationship, but it is a relationship that serves it’s purpose at that time.   Sometimes these relationships (as friends or lovers) do last the tests of time … sometimes not.

Sometimes relationships break down because it is all to easy to forget that a relationship of any kind is based on team work – on two people, who have to take responsibility for their actions and the reactions that they might cause.

A successful relationship will only work if two people are realistic enough to understand that nothing is ever perfect, you will disagree, you will argue, you will cry, you will get angry.   You will also agree, smile, laugh, love and will find a peace in you that is too special to lose.



Do you believe in Star signs?

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I am NOT a great believe in star signs at all … BUT … I had an email today from one of my friends (also a Capricorn.. but NOTHING like me at all!) … she found this .. and decided it was me to a tee! … unfortunately I have to agree with her …. it did make me laugh .. and for my friends who know me well .. I think you will “mostly” agree too!!   

The Capricorn partner

Relationships aren’t easy for Capricorn. You might expect this, since control is always important to the Goat, and letting down the solid protection of that suit of armour takes a lot of effort. Capricorns wear that suit of armour for so long that it gets rusty at the hinges, and you hear some pretty loud groans and protests as it comes off. And no matter how much they love, there’s always a last secret place inside which Capricorns won’t relinquish. They’re often loners, climbing their own private mountains. And sometimes they won’t allow themselves to accept either help or sympathy when the going is rough. Thanks very much, they’ll manage on their own.

They will often work hard to help friends and loved ones in need, and they know how to give, especially when it comes to the things of the world. But sometimes they don’t know how to receive very well. Capricorn pride is ferocious, and no Goat can bear a situation of weakness and dependency. That means not being in control.

Capricorns are secret romantics, but they won’t allow their romanticism to dictate their decisions. They will often sacrifice the great romantic love for the safe, suitable partner who is a social asset as well. They may throw everything away for an ideal, or for family, or in the name of service; but love? Not likely. Capricorn wants a stable life, and takes vows and promises seriously. Better not to promise than to marry in haste, repent at leisure, and have hefty maintenance payments afterward.

Some Capricorns take a long time to make a real commitment. If you’re in a hurry, pick another sign. Yet this isn’t a bad way to be. Capricorns place more value on deep respect, duty, loyalty and the power of the family bond than on a few months of wild passion. Not that they turn their backs on passion. This is an earth sign, and the sexual drive is often strong. But many Capricorns keep this side of themselves out of their serious relationships, because they often don’t trust their passions.

Unless you’re the childlike type looking for a parent- surrogate, be prepared for a challenge. A Capricorn will always try to take charge in a relationship. She isn’t interested in submission, dependency or abdication of power. If you hurt her pride or take away her self-respect, she won’t forgive or forget. Because of that earthy, controlled nature, she may also find it hard to express love and affection spontaneously. Sexual attraction, yes; but love can make her vulnerable. The Capricorn partner may love you deeply, but you may never hear it said. Yet she’s deeply drawn to those who can loosen her up a bit.

The same thing that makes many Capricorns secret spiritual seekers also makes them seekers after people who are able to open up the romantic and imaginative side of life for them. This old-young woman needs a partner who can help her free her inner child. The trouble is that, when Capricorns find this kind of partner, they often take the role of a stern parent with a child, repressing rather than encouraging spontaneity. Yet if Capricorns can let that stern, stiff streak be thawed by the gifts of love and trust, they truly have the world at their feet. Then there is no more loyal and devoted partner, nor one more worthy of lifelong respect.

The Capricorn woman

It may be hard to imagine a woman who embodies the father- principle. But Capricorn women do. This doesn’t make them “masculine”. Quite the reverse: they often have a subtle, magnetic, quietly self-possessed quality which is powerfully attractive. Masculine? Not in the sense people usually use the word. But look again. The Capricorn woman is shrewd and perceptive. She’d rather use diplomacy than argue aggressively; she is usually calm, cool, and self-contained but does not have patience to deal with dishonesty and certainly does not suffer fools gladly!

Although upfront and straight talking, she is also smart enough to know that you don’t confront power directly, and therefore, if she wants something from you, you usually end up thinking that you came up with the idea yourself. She can twist you around with such finesse that you’re convinced she’s fragile and helpless, and your self-importance swells visibly. Ah, poor you. No Capricorn is fragile or helpless. All Capricorn women are born with stainless steel spines.

This doesn’t mean Capricorn women use people. Some do; their realism (and sometimes outright calculating cynicism) makes them choose partners who can provide material security and status or help them with a creative career. But many are devoted partners who offer their powerful will, determination and worldly wisdom to help you in your career. Playing the power behind the throne suits the Capricorn woman quite well. That is, as long as you respect her for it, and don’t take her love and devotion for granted.

Capricorns need to manage something. If no career attracts her enough to earn her commitment, her partner can become her career. Then she’ll organise your life and direct your energy, sometimes to your gain but often to your detriment if the goals you’re pursuing are really secretly hers. She really needs a place in her life where she can apply her gifts outside her personal relationships. Let her get on with it, and give her all your support. Capricorn needs to feel accomplished in something. Beware of the Capricorn woman who doesn’t recognise that she even has the drive. Unconsciously, she’ll begin to make you her accomplishment. That’s not usually a recipe for happiness.

Time and experience are great healers for Capricorn. The Capricorn woman is at her best as she gets older, blossoming into the warmest, richest side of the sign later in life. When she has learned to stand confidently on her own feet in life, she is free to release the gentler, more sensitive and caring side of her nature. The Capricorn woman who has passed the test of her own survival, and knows that she can function in the world through her own efforts, has learned wisdom and compassion along the way. If you’re looking for a flamboyant showgirl, this isn’t the sign to choose. If you’re looking for intelligence, grit, tenacity, insight, loyalty and a delightfully ironic sense of humour, look no further; you’ve found your match.

Out of the twelve Zodiac signs, Capricorn is most compatible with Taurus, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces, and is least compatible with Gemini, Aries, Cancer, Leo, Libra, Sagittarius and Aquarius.

Dream it .. and do it!

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A quick wee story for you …

A very good friend of mine has a wonderfully talented daughter who loves to be different!

She recently organised her own wedding, making all the decorations and bouquets herself, in her own unique and wonderful style.

She has now set up a Facebook page with some of her creations .. and they are so good and so unusual I just had to let you know about them!   Have a wee look .. and smile!



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When you start to really know someone all their physical characteristics start to disappear. You begin to dwell in their energy. You recognize the scent of their skin. You see only the essence of the the person, Not the shell. That’s why you can’t fall in love with beauty..You can lust after it, be infatuated with it, want to own it, you can love it with your eyes and body but not your heart.  That’s why when you really connect with a persons inner self any physical imperfections disappear and become irrelevant

I found this statement in a group I am in on Facebook today and it hit a wee spot with me and no doubt a few people out there.

I have been very guilt in the past of being keen on someone because of the way they looked … and nine times out of ten I have been left feeling disappointed as their look never made me happy.   Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that there was anything wrong with these ex lovers… just that we did not connect in a way that satisfied me or her!

Attraction is a funny thing, what you find attractive and cute at the beginning can become nothing more than an annoyance later on, leaving you frustrated and flailing in a relationship that is doomed to fail.

What really touches my heart and makes me love completely is someone who I can connect with in a very emotional way .. someone strong enough to stand up and allow their soul to be “naked” in an honest and true way.

I do not fall in love with people who I like the look of, I fall in love with women who I connect with – women I understand and who understand me.  Women that I trust.

I also do not fall in love easily or quickly .. it takes me time and I like that … I would hate to fall in love with everyone I dated … all that emotion would kill me *smile*.

I don’t know all the answers to love, I don’t know all the answers to me … and nor do I want to .. a lovely wee surprise connection is always welcome!

Be still ….

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Sometimes we rush.   Sometimes we hurry.   Sometimes we push.  Sometimes we just want to be held and wanted, whether it be for the right or wrong reasons.

Most of the time we simply need to sit back and let things happen around us, spin on our own axis and let the world take care of itself.

This is what I am doing right now  – I am just sitting back and letting life sort itself out – what will be, will be.   I am not going to rush or push or hurry into doing something just because sometimes I would like to cuddle up and watch a movie.   I have a dog for that.

I know a couple of my friends (actually I can think of four!) are all in the same position as me at the moment – they all need time out for themselves, to let things settle, to find their feet and their peace again.    I’m one of the lucky one’s .. I have found mine – but I am just going to let things happen around me ….  Im going to do nothing  … I am going to be still.

Little things ….

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It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important. 

(Sir Arthur Conan Doyle)

There is no “big thing” in life that has not started out as a “little thing” ….  and so often the little things are overlooked and not realised.

We need people in our lives who understand that sometimes it is the little things that matter to us … we need them to listen to our little concerns so we know we can trust them with bigger stuff.

When I get to the point that I am having to repeat something to someone over and over again I realise that they are just not interested in listening, it is not that they are not capable, they just do not care enough to do so.

It is time to walk away then.

Different stages …




A wee conversation started up today on Facebook about the wildness of our youth and how our priorities change as we get older.

It is true that what was important to us when we were younger, socially as well as emotionally, is very different to what we want (and need!) as we get older.

I know what I want … and that is peace .. and an easy, truthful, respectful relationship where someone can understand me .. and I can understand her…

I want someone who makes me smile when I think about them, and who smiles when they think about me…

Someone who likes hoovering would also be good.


No regrets

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Regret is a punishment that we give ourselves.   It is the inability to accept that we have tried the very best we could in circumstances in our past.   There is no use wishing for a different outcome, a different reaction, a different situation, we have to accept what has gone and move forward.

We have to accept that our choice, whether right or wrong was the choice that WE made, no-one forced us… we made our choice and we have to accept that at the time it was a decision that felt right to us, whatever our reasons, whether it be fear, guilt or frustration.

I found this quote that sums it up quite nicely:

“If you followed your heart, then whatever the outcome, you acted bravely, and deserve to feel pride not regret. Try to understand and accept that it is impossible to foresee every potential outcome in any scenario. It is also impossible to know what results the alternative choice may have brought. You trusted your intuition, and even though you may not like the results that this action brought, undoubtedly you can learn and grow from the situation.”

There really is no point in tearing ourselves apart because of regret… we cannot change our past decisions and we have to accept our position or situation as it is and move forward.   In the end the only person who is punishing us is ourselves.

Some write the music.. others write the words

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words and music

Image thanks to Lushquotes.com

Some write the music … others write the words … some dance…others just listen.

Being different people with different ways of feeling and expressing emotion is one of the most beautiful things about being human. When we are open to our hearts music and poetry are the most popular way of expressing emotion and occasionally we hear a song that stirs our heart and evokes a long hidden feeling or memory or we see words on a page that speak to us, or speak for us.

Life is very much like a beautiful song that we all want to sing … sometimes we go off tune, sometimes we forget the words, but it doesn’t really matter as every song will have a meaning to us, what we decide to do with the middle bit is up to us … learn the words, change the words, add a score, slow it down… it is our choice.

Sometimes we hear a beautiful rhythm but cannot get our words to fit no matter how we try .. in the end if we try too hard we either  lose part of the beauty of the music .. or the meaning of the words.

Nothing should be forced, rhythms should come together naturally, but with music and with rhyme, if it doesn’t then we need to accept that and carry on searching.

The beat goes on……..

I want to know what love is



I have just had a very interesting online conversation with someone who has just read my blog.   I don’t know this girl and she does not know me .. but she liked the blog and asked why I came across so cynical towards love.

It was a hard question to answer … and I’m not sure I know the answer to it anyway.

She went onto say that 2 months ago she met a woman who is her “soul mate”, they are looking for flat together now and talking about having a family in the future and looking into the best way of doing this.

I asked her if she felt this was a long enough time to know someone to make these types of decisions and her reply was “Yes, everytime I see her I just want to make love to her”.

Now .. I’m all for a bit of passion and butterflies, but to build a “relationship” on the fact that you want to have sex with someone is, in my opinion, a recipe for disaster.

It takes me a while to fall in love, but when I love, I do love, maybe not in a huge passionate way, but in my way.  I like to see what is left after the passion dies down a bit.

Maybe I have this all wrong .. I am really not sure … maybe I think differently, maybe I’m more cautious, but I certainly wouldn’t commit like that after 2 months!

What do you think??   Am I wrong?

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