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The Quest

To find what you are looking for,

Give up being second best.

Refuse to be a secret,

Do not settle for anything less.

 

Find the arms to hold you,

When your mind is lost and dark.

Find a heart that listens,

As you find your own way back.

 

Find the truth in your own honesty,

Do not try to fool, or believe your own lies

Listen to your heart.

And witness with your eyes.

 

Find comfort in the silence,

Do not expect or demand,

Let me see your honest soul,

And simply hold my hand.

The mirror has two faces

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A quote by Rose Morgan (Barbara Streisland) from the movie “The Mirror has two faces”

l think l’ve reached the point where you know you’ll never get married.

Married? What’s marriage? A ring, a contract. Fighting, compromising.

lt can be more than that. You know what l envy about people in love?

l’d love it if someone really knew me.

What l like. What l’m afraid of. What kind of toothpaste l use.

 l think that would really be wonderful.

 True love has spiritual dimensions, while romantic love is a lie.

 A myth. A soulless manipulation. And speaking of manipulation …

 lt’s like going to the movies and seeing the lovers kiss …

 The music swells, and we buy it, right?

 So when my date kisses me, and l don’t hear strings, l dump him.

 The question is, why do we buy it?

 Because, myth or manipulation, we all want to fall in love.

 That experience makes us feel completely alive.

 Our everyday reality is shattered, and we are flung into the heavens.

 lt may only last a moment, an hour, but that doesn’t diminish its value.

 We’re left with memories we treasure for the rest of our lives.

 l read, ”When we fall in love, we hear Puccini in our heads.”

 l love that. His music expresses our need for passion and romantic love.

 We listen to La Bóheme or Turandot, or read WutheringHeights, –

 – or watch Casablanca, and a little of that love lives in us too.

  So the final question is: Why do people want to fall in love –

 – when it can have such a short run and be so painful?

 – Propagation of the species? – We need to connect with somebody.

 – Are we culturally preconditioned? – Good, but too intellectual for me.

 l think it’s because, as some of you may already know …

               While it does last, it feels fucking great!

 

A woman’s soul

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A woman's soul

My no-where place…

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Peace of mind is a strange thing.   It develops it’s importance over the years, sneaking up from behind the need to be rich, famous, successful or anything else.

As I have aged I have changed and developed who I am, not by any deliberation but by a slow natural process. I know that I have now reached the place in life where peace of mind is the most important thing for me.

The past year or so, I have spent time mulling about, thinking a lot, spending time on my own and getting to know me all over again after realising that somewhere I had lost the soul of who I was.

It hasn’t always easy, I’ve made a few mistakes, I’ve handled things in the wrong way (and I am certainly not proud of those things), but they have helped me on my journey.

Recently I was flung into another turmoil, a rather more lovely and pleasant turmoil than some of the the things that have been rattling round my old brain – but still, something that could mix up my life as it was such a shock to me.   It made me suspicious and protective of myself.

Then something slowly dawned on me… life isn’t about possibilities or maybe’s, life is about actual situations and “the moment”, not the any future that we may dream of, or hope for.

I decided to take a risk, because that is what felt right in my head.   I’m glad I did.

My no-where place has a new chapter in it’s life.  A chapter that so far is filled with laughter, affection and good feeling.

My place of peace.   No amount of money can buy this feeling.

 

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