The truth

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The truth is never easy to face up to.    Especially when it involves looking inwards.

I have been lied to many times in my life.  Most of the time I have known it but chose to ignore it.

I do not mind the truth, even if it hurts, I can deal with that.   What I cannot deal with is lies that are used by others to gain sympathy or pity .. or to simply get their own way.

I have often been left in total confusion with lies .. you never quite know what is the truth .. and what is said to hurt .. but you lose something then .. you lose the trust you have in someone and that is a very difficult thing to get back.

At times I have been made to feel like a dirty secret, a bit of “rough” … and I am certainly none of those.    

I have taken time out to look inside, to find out if I was the monster, the destroyer I was painted out to be … and the answer is now clear.   No I am not.

I am not perfect, hell, no-one is, but I am open and honest, sometimes to a fault.. and sometimes that is used against me.

Will I change… nope.. no feckin chance!! …  I am happy with me and my life.   It is a pity that others are not, but that is for them to work on, not me.

The Quest

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The Quest

To find what you are looking for,

Give up being second best.

Refuse to be a secret,

Do not settle for anything less.


Find the arms to hold you,

When your mind is lost and dark.

Find a heart that listens,

As you find your own way back.


Find the truth in your own honesty,

Do not try to fool, or believe your own lies

Listen to your heart.

And witness with your eyes.


Find comfort in the silence,

Do not expect or demand,

Let me see your honest soul,

And simply hold my hand.

Useless pride…

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Image from wallpapersonweb.com



“It is better to lose your pride with someone you love rather than to lose that someone you love with your useless pride”




Pride is a great weapon .. it keeps up fighting when hope is lost but it is also an enemy of the heart.    How many of us have been too proud to say  “I’m sorry”, too proud to say “I love you”.. probably more of us than will ever admit it.

I learned a long time ago that pride was often the thing that hurt the most, whether it be because of losing someone I cared for or, in my case, losing everything that I worked so hard for.

Don’t get me wrong .. I am still a proud woman but I realise that pride is often selfish and the only one who is really affected by it is me.

I look upon people who I know and I feel sorry for them, I know they are in the battle between their heart and their pride, a war they will probably fight for a long time yet.  I hope for their sake that their heart wins because if they are always ruled by pride they will end up very lonely and inward people.

Never be too proud to say what you think or what you feel .. honesty may hurt but lies hurt more and in the end the person who will be hurting you .. is you.




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