Picture from blog.peacockandpaisley.comThere are many crossroads in life.  Some we pass through without realising, until we look back at our past, at others we have to decide what is the best route for us to follow.

Often we meet the same choices at different times in our life, but each time we reach this point the road we choose will,  more often than not, be different.  As it should be.  If it never changes, we never grow, develop, become.

Today has been one of those days for me.. I think, deep down, I knew it was coming but this weekend I have a lot of thinking to do.  I have been fighting with my conscience and my need over the past few months and much more so over the last week, but today a comment made me realise that perhaps the decision I have been in a quandry over is actually what is needed.

I am not sure if this was a flippant comment made in anger, or whether it is something that has been thought about and discussed in circles that I am not part of.  I suspect it may be the latter.

Whatever .. maybe it is time for a change, I need to stop this feeling of flatlining .. I seem to get this feeling when I know something has to change, it is buried deep inside me, almost like an inside knowledge, it comes to the fore when I accept it.

I tend to run from things where I am not wanted .. I guess it is my defence mechanism kicking in .. I prefer to walk rather than being pushed.

I am tired fighting against the wind .. I think I will just surrender to it and see where it takes me.

There is a life out there, not just an existence .. I think I need to find it.